The Top 6 Reasons Why It’s Scary to be A Mobile App

Ghosts, ghouls, witches, and even vampires may come out of the woodwork on Halloween, but to a mobile app they’re hardly reason to shriek into the night. As I considered what costumes I could create that would elicit the most screams and bring my fair share of terror into the night, I caught myself thinking. If I was mobile app, what would be scary to me? Zombies, trolls, and Frankenstein don’t cause a stir, but plenty of items come to mind, and each year they’re getting worse. I bring you:

The Top 6 Reasons Why It’s Scary to be Me: A Mobile App

1. The App Ecosystem – Costume Idea: An extra on Michael Jackson’s Thriller

There are over 1.75 million mobile apps available for download in the app ecosystem. Every week it is growing and getting organically discovered seems as likely as setting the high score for Candy Crush Saga. As a mobile app, I just want to be downloaded and do what I was made to do, but I need to be found first.

Being a part of the app ecosystem is like being an extra on Michael Jackson’s Thriller. You may look great, have all the moves, but no one is going to pay attention to you unless you’re at the front and your name’s MJ.

Get into the spotlight with: ASO, Press

2. Churn – Costume Idea: Zombies (undead customers)

The only thing that hurts more than being all alone in an App Store is being found, downloaded, and then discarded. I may only live in digital space, but I have feelings too. You want to know what’s really scary? Retention rates! On average, retention rates drop to below 30% after a short 90 days.

I’m quickly left wondering, where did all the people go who downloaded me? Is there a way to bring my (un)dead customers back? It makes me shutter thinking about all the zombies who have me on their phones. I wish I knew why some customers left and why some stayed.

Raise the dead with: Engagement, In-app Customer Support – It’s time to bring them back “Warm Bodies” style – with a little love.

3. Device/OS Fragmentation– Costume Idea: Dr. Jeykell & Mr. Hyde

You are all so terribly hard to please! I think I am going a little crazy trying to handle every new operating system and device that gets released. Android is the usual suspect with over 10,000 distinct Android devices seen this year and eight different OS’s in use. Apple’s fragmentation is nothing to scoff at though, the generations of iPad’s, iPod’s, and iPhone’s adding up is starting to give me a headache as well.

I’m afraid to fall asleep at night not knowing where I might crash and bug out tomorrow. I feel like I have a thousand split personalities. Compared to me, Dr. Jeykell and Mr. Hyde had it easy.

Prevent odd behavior with: Testing

4. Negative Reviews – Costume Idea: The Girl From The Ring

There is nobody more unhappy looking than the girl from the ring. She’s so unhappy that looking at her makes me feel terrible inside, thus her image will not be placed on this page. She’s so unhappy that she makes other people unhappy just by being in the same room with her.

Apparently I make people so unhappy that they leave negative reviews in the app store (ouch). Most of the time I don’t know what is wrong from their comments or they’re upset about a bug that has been squashed (change your review if the problem has been fixed!). These negative reviews make people think they won’t be happy if they download me, but that’s simply not true! I have many happy customers but they’re just too busy being happy to take the time to leave a review. My reputation is based on star ratings and reviews, and it really cheers me up when my happy customers leave a rating.

Turn that frown upside down with: Apptentive :)

5. Marketing Budgets – Costume Idea: Ghost

There is a lot of noise in the mobile industry and I somehow seem to drift through it all like a ghost. Nobody sees me and I haven’t quite saved up enough money for the “don’t be a ghost” operation. Even with cash to burn, I’ve heard it’s still difficult to be noticed. As mobile continues to grow, I’m afraid that some marketing budgets will be too big to keep up with (some already are).

Correctly marketing me is a task that my creators can no longer ignore as it is crucial to every app’s success. The time of making apps and making it big without a marketing strategy is long gone. I am beautiful and talented so make a marketing plan to get me noticed. Not every marketing plan needs money to work.

Make Casper a real boy with: Creativity, Relationships with Bloggers, Review Sites

6. Development Costs – Costume Idea: It’s Alive!!!!! (Frankenstein)

Holy broomsticks! My great great grandfather was made for only 10 cents, but mobile apps these days can cost into the hundreds of millions of dollars. Once the mobile app development process begins, every little feature, design change, update, and maintenance starts to add up. It’s like Frankenstein coming alive and reaping havoc all across the town while you’re helpless to stop him (because you love him so much).

Now, I don’t think there is anything more important than me, but I can sympathize with what these growing costs can mean for businesses that want an app like me. In an effort to preserve and promote my kind, I urge you to be smart about how you develop your app. There are lots of tools out there (some free, some not) that will save you hours upon hours of dev time, cut down on maintenance, and are cheaper than doing it yourself.

Stop the monster rampage with: 3rd Party Solutions (Push, Support, Analytics etc.), Minimum Viable Product, Find a friendly dev who takes payment in candy corn.

Being Prepared

The only way to beat my fears is by being prepared, just as the only way anyone is going to survive the Zombie Apocalypse is by being ready for it. Having strategies in place for all of these issues are as important as the development of an app. Without knowing how to handle these issues, your app won’t get very far. Do your research, spend time sketching out ideas, and make a plan for your app even before development begins.

If you have any other suggestions on what mobile apps need to know and prepare for in order to survive please share in the comments, I want to survive!